Unearthed: A Powerful Memoir of Trauma, Truth, and the Journey to Healing
By Asma G
Content Warning (CW): This review and book contain references to sexual assault and rape.
Unearthed by Chanchal Garg (published in June 2025) is a memoir that is both painful and brave. The book delves into Garg’s early life and experiences that shaped her, including being part of a group akin to a spiritual cult. This itself understandably impacted her for decades, let alone the trauma it unleashed.
If you google Chanchal Garg, you’ll find a press note that shares more about her as a speaker, author, executive coach and facilitator of “conscious leadership”. This book isn’t about her academic or leadership work, but is a personal memoir, that goes much further back.
A DIFFICULT CHILDHOOD
The author (given the name Nirmal at birth), describes a complicated childhood, growing up as the only child of two Indian immigrants in New Orleans. In a bid to explain her childhood, in the author’s note, Garg writes, “I was raised as if I were born in 1970s Punjab, India, even though my parents lived in New Orleans, Louisiana. Holding onto their roots was not just important to them–it was their compass.”
This explanation goes a long way in helping readers understand the intricacies of Garg’s tricky childhood. Her childhood is in fact characterised by constant code-switching – enjoying reading the Ramayana and other devotional practices with her parents and being a good, Indian girl at home, while trying to be a normal American girl at school.
Garg writes that she quickly realised the need to code-switch even with her Indian friends, in order to avoid being ostracised, describing how they would roll their eyes and walk away from her if she let slip how much she enjoyed singing Kirtan. Instead, she learnt to act as if she were put off by signing these devotional songs, writing poignantly: “Betraying myself felt like the only way to connect.”
Garg’s childhood was far removed from those of her peers –
“My friends spent weekends going to the mall or binging on movies and pizzas at sleepovers, while my parents wanted me to focus on extra study, prayer, and chores. Now, as my family and I sat on the floor, bowls of dahl and roti spread before us, a small pang of longing lit itself within me. I wondered what my girlfriends would be doing right now. Probably watching the latest episode of Beverly Hills 90210, I thought. Not that I knew too much about any of that. It was like another language to me.”
FAMILY DYNAMICS
While Garg doesn’t delve into her relationship with her father in detail, the tension and fear she felt in her father’s presence and their tenuous relationship is jarringly obvious and painful to read about, especially when she writes about his explosive reaction to her wanting to go to a sleepover. He also apparently calls her a “disgrace” to their family after she performs in her school choir’s gala. Garg decides to hide her continued participation in her school’s show choir from her parents and describes how she even becomes vigilant about what she shares with her mother.
The author’s well-honed focus on the details of her early life lay the foundation of traumatic events that unfold later in her life.
TRAUMA AND ASSAULT
A pivotal turning point in Garg’s life is when she attends a seminar to meet her father’s guru, whom she refers to as Babaji. At this stage, she is a teenager, and Garg describes how her family follows his work in the US – attending all his seminars there and some in India. Babaji has a large following and what follows is a nightmare for Garg – 10 years of alleged sexual assault and rape. She writes about decades spent silencing her intuition that something is wrong with her behaviour.
There’s no let up in the trauma— she writes about marrying one of his disciples, sharing that the family she marries into is controlling and abusive, both emotionally and financially.
Unearthed explores how Garg was led to doubt herself and ignore her intuition over decades, starting with her father ignoring her discomfort after an older man forced her to sit on his lap and tickled her when she was 14, to her first husband disbelieving her when she mentioned the sexual assault at the hands of Babaji.
Garg learns to shut down her feelings of discomfort after her experience of being disbelieved by her first husband and tells herself that her guru’s actions stem from an understanding of things far beyond her comprehension. Describing her inner turmoil after her first experience of assault at the hands of Babaji, she writes, “Despite the confusion and hurt, this experience didn’t diminish my devotion to him. If anything, it widened the distance between who I was and the pedestal I had placed him on. The weight of my unworthiness wrapped around me like an endless tide, pulling me under.”
Garg finally decides to tell her family, and eventually her second husband, but has to contend with a very painful reaction—he perceives the sexual abuse as a betrayal to him, somehow, and is angry with her. This is despite the fact that the couple attends numerous couples therapy sessions where therapists try unsuccessfully explaining the power dynamics in a cult to him.
SOME REPRIEVE
Garg finally finds reprieve while training to become a facilitator for a course at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business, where she realises that it is possible for her to experience something different from her past experiences.
During the training, Garg doesn’t face recrimination and blame for being abused but is treated with empathy and is accepted just as she is.
Unearthed is a powerful book because of Garg’s ability and willingness to explore and explain incredibly painful aspects of her life, in service of explaining just how survivors of sexual abuse are treated when they try speaking up and how they are made to doubt themselves and blamed for the abuse they experience.
While it isn’t a book I’d recommend to everyone given the sensitive topics it delves into it is definitely one to read for people trying to understand the culture of silence that exists around sexual abuse, globally.
Disclaimer: This review discusses themes of sexual violence, including sexual assault and rape, which may be distressing for some readers. If you or someone you know is affected by these issues, please consider seeking support from a qualified mental health professional or helpline.
Views expressed are personal.
About the Reviewer: Asma G is a feminist writer with an interest in public policy and mental health. You can read more of her pieces right here, and find her on Instagram at @asmag7
